Tuesday, February 16, 2010

My Book Report: Love & War

I feel like I'm in school again doing a book report. But I got a book out of it, it was a really good book & I love these authors!
This was book was provided for review by WaterBrook Multnomah. And you can go HERE To get a copy for yourself & Trust me you will want to.

This book is really a "must" read for any married couple. This book isn't saying you have to do all the right things to find the marriage you have been dreaming of. It's really telling you WHO to look towards and WHO to strive to be like to have those dreams come true. Now it's not something that will happen overnight or it won't stay with you forever BUT you will have to "daily" work on items in which you have a hard time with. Thus reminds me of the verse in the Bible about "daily picking up your cross and following Jesus" (Luke something) I so like how they opened it up and they told me "It can be done & it is worth it"
It makes this book so readable and applicable to the lives that are reading & willing to change how they are acting. It is one of the best (if not the best) Marriage books out there. It goes from start to finish and then at the end it tells you to start the process all over again.

One of the first things this book talks about is Desire. Not trying to figure out what went wrong but finding the desire that God put in you in the first place. God also made us as human beings with a deep purpose to love and to be loved. I know I can think back to a time and a place where I was craving my parents love over and over again. BUT then I found the love of my Heavenly Father enter into my heart the day I asked him to lead & direct my life. I always will want my parents to love me but I don't seek it day after day. Just like now I will always want Rick (my husband) to love me but I know that God loves me and if I look towards him and I find who I am in him then all the other relationships in my life will result with God's love overflowing from me to them. God will always love us, always fight for us & he still fights for us in the great and terrible clash between the Kingdom of God and the kingdom of darkness.

Marriage ask everything out of us. Thus resulting with tears, sleepless nights, sacrifice. We are investing a lot into our spouse. Just as they are investing a lot into us. Which is why we must have a vision or a desire for it. Because we are made in the image of God , we were made in the image of Love thus meaning we need each other --- DESPERATELY. We have been entrusted with our spouses heart. That is a HUGE amount of responsibility.

The Eldredge's came up with 3 top things that would most help marriage.
1) Find life in God
2) Deal with your brokenness
3) Learn to shut down the spiritual attacks that come against your marriage.

If you deal with your brokenness with God and you have found a way to deal with that solution THEN you aren't always trying to take what is broken in your life to your spouse and having them fix it all the time. The more you find yourself in God and find ways how to deal with your past and hardships as well as if your spouse is doing the same thing. Just think as you are looking up to God and finding yourself in him as you both are looking and walking towards God wouldn't that mean that you are walking closer towards your spouse. I guess I have always looked as marriage as the triangle effect. God is the Center of your marriage he is the top part of your triangle. You are one part and your spouse the other...the more you take steps towards God the more you go closer to your spouse.
Shutting down spiritual attacks that come in your marriage are dealt with in doing things together. Praying together, but also praying for each other in your different times of the day. Spending time together at meals, going on drives, asking how your day was, rocking out to music together, playing games together, planning trips together, and what ever you might enjoy. You could even read the Bible together or other books that you both like reading. The important thing about Bible reading is making sure you get your time with God in. If you are only looking at the time you read the Bible is at church or with your spouse...that is not enough time. God wants to spend more time with you! (I know this from experience...I can't wait until I get to a point in my walk with God and doing a good habit all the time that I will CRAVE my time with God. Just like I CRAVE my time with my husband or I CRAVE that time with my family.

I never could remember how to "close" a book report so here is my version of it.
This book is HIGHLY recommended for marriages.
It's readable & applicable.
If you have read any of the Eldredge's other books and you like them...THIS is WAY better then anything before.
If you haven't read their books before THIS one should be at the top of your list.

IF money was NOT an option I would give this book away to 15-25 of my friends who have gotten married in the last 5-6 years however I am still the wife of a medical student and money is not here...sorry.


  1. i've read several great review of this book, and i'm a big fan of john & stasi eldredge. i really want to read this now. thanks for your review!

  2. Thanks for your review, Katrina! I really wanna get this now. Their books have been life changing for me and what you've written here makes me feel that this one would be huge as well.
    I know that my DH and I have a great marriage but it's always good to refresh and bring new meaning and insight into what we already have, isn't it. And yes, their 3 top helps are SO true!.

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  4. I agree, I want to buy it for everyone I know! And I agree it's the best book they've written yet. The others were alright, but this one is really a "must read!"

    I think I took some of the book a little different than you did, I saw it more this way: I liked their focus on our marriage having an enemy and that he puts "gas on the fire" and all that. We're not used to seeing it that way and don't realize the true danger and what's really going on. They gave specific spiritual warfare examples and I thought that was very helpful.

    And admiting that our brokenness is real and not just a "lack of discipline", etc. Then how to deal with it all in the right way.

    Great book! Did you read my review? It was fun that we both got to review the same book :)


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